The more time I spend at home, the more I realize that oftentimes, it is not my job to teach. It’s my job to learn. I wonder if that’s a constant thing. I know we can always continue to learn, and that you can “learn something new everyday”. But as you get older…is it more your job to teach and less your job to learn? Life is so confusing. I tend to think that now I’m in college and almost have a BA, I’m more knowledgeable…I should be the one in charge and teaching everyone who hasn’t reached this point in life everything that I know. It’s just not true. I’m so stupid, you guys. I still care what others think of me. I still get annoyed at things I have no reason to. I still worry about things I have no control over. And I still try and take care of things when it isn’t their time yet.
I’m not really talking about information learning…I’m sure you knew that. I mean, I could care less about most mathematical equations and historical events and stuff. Not that they aren’t important..it’s just that…they’re not important. I like learning about life. I like learning about other cultures, and I like learning about how other people think. I like learning about the reason why things happen. And I like learning about what could happen. Half the reason I’m an English major is because I love reading about things I could never experience.
This may be treasonous, but what the hey….here’goes. I don’t really care for the United States all that much. It’s not that I don’t appreciate America, or that I hate veterans or anything like that. I just know that I’d be able to appreciate it more if I experienced somewhere else. I want to travel so bad it’s not even funny. And I don’t mean tourism-hop-on-a-bus-take-pictures-of-elephants-and-the-Eiffel-Tower travel. I mean I want to live in so many different places. I don’t just want to learn about other cultures from a book or a TV show or second hand. I really want to live in Europe, and Africa, and South America. And shoot, I don’t mind the cold…why not Antarctica?
I get frustrated because my mom doesn’t seem to share my enthusiasm about this. There’s always that stupid heart to worry about. What happens if I have atrial flutter while I’m overseas…well…I’ll figure it out when it happens. My cardiologist is overseas enough…I’ll just track him down.
I think I was made by God in a way so that I could travel. First, I have the desire to. A very very very strong desire to. And I always have. Second, I don’t require much relational upkeep. I don’t get too attached to people…and for the most part, it doesn’t really bother me. I crave new experiences…I think that’s why I cause so much drama all the time.
Anyway…there isn’t really a point to this blog other than sharing my thoughts. I stumbled upon this family’s website tonight which really made me want to say “forget school” and start saving up to travel around the world. They just up and moved to the Cook Islands. They have two daughters, one who is barely seven months old. They both had good careers, they had a beautiful house in L.A., and they just decided they wanted to move to the Islands to experience the slow paced lifestyle. They have to hunt for their own meat (fishing), gather their own fruits and vegetables, and barter for things that they need other than that. Man. I’m jealous.